Leaflet No. 8
This week’s leaflet tea tastes like … seaweed, coconut oil, Glass Onion, Legos, and divestment from worn ways of being
Hello, everyone.
Tea Leaf Tech is a process in which I brew a cup of the Beobab.tree’s blend (its bark, leaves, its fruit, and a dapple of honey—of course!), which is a way to introduce settling and warmth into the day’s spiral of events. During this time of sipping and slowness, ideas and images collect at the bottom of the cup. The readings of the tea leaves laid to rest on ceramic glaze will be the basis of Wednesday’s leaflets. From here, I invite you to sit with your own cuppa and peruse what sensations this week’s tea blend has to offer.
Enjoying:
🌺Leah’s Field Notes’ “gentle habits for a cozy year” YouTube video. A cozy reminder for me to take more walks, that I am my own energetic puppy who could definitely benefit from seeing some ants carry a leaf across asphalt. Leah also inspired and reminded me to make time for my “forgotten projects”, which I hope to share naturally as time goes on.
🌺Dr. Ayesha Khan’s “I don't want to be successful, I just want us to be free” essay. This reflection is the kind I highlight in my BeoBriefing about how in awe and thankful I become when I read people’s understandings of their relation with the world and its systems. For me, I’m taking with me the personal resonance I have towards divesting “in the rat race as much as possible”. It’s true: I just find my enjoyment in so many other things like connecting with folks and the land, going to bed early as protecting my peace, and choosing vocations that prioritize my values over a need to “make it big”.
I’ve been asking myself: what would success look like for me if I wasn’t afraid of being truthful and unhidden? And then: how am I actively creating this success in any capacity every day?
An example of healing related to growing away from rat-race-antics I have happened a few months ago when I was attending a Zoom informational session for a graduate school. Another woman around my age had her camera on and was cheerfully engaging with the hosts through asking questions, giving energetic facial reactions, and just being a chill-seeming person. In a moment of curiosity and insecurity, I googled her. She’s cool. She’s done some really cool things in undergrad relevant to the field of study. Plus, she has some cool hobbies (many that we both share, eep). I started wondering how many students each application cycle would accept, and I spiraled towards wondering, “What if it came down to either accepting her vs. me? *gasp*”. I lined up my W.I.P. resume with her public internet biography and tried to do algebra.
Then, procedurally, a beautiful moment of self-awareness washed over me: I was giving power to fear. Giving weight to my insecurity of being rejected by an institution, simply because it was an esteemed institution that I am still learning about.
I was indulging in a scarcity mindset that prioritized turning another person into personhood-less competition rather than a potential colleague or friend. “A friend!”, I thought, “I wonder if we could be friends if we happen to connect in that way. We both like watching movies, after all. I hope we both get in, that we both have the opportunity to choose this school.” My posture for the rest of the Zoom session entirely changed.
How lovely it was to create peace for myself, to reframe the way I saw another person after being repeatedly shown, growing up, weirdly aggressive platitudes like “do whatever it takes”, “trust no one”, “eat or be eaten”. We can talk about how painfully unloving and capitalist the English language is another time.
🌺 John Paul Brammer’s advice column, “Am I My (Lack of) Career?” from ¡Hola Papi!. Every now and then I catch myself intertwining my worth with what job I have, or by what is developing in my career. Right now I am, with nervous laughter, #OpenToWork (If you’re on LinkedIn, you might be smiling by this reference) and I am also #OpenToRest. I am open…to my timing. Some call it “divine timing”. Which is to say, I am putting my effort into opportunities that I am aware excite me or prompt me to keep creating a sustainable living for myself. At the same time, I have the privilege of living with my family, and understand that this is time to clarify my steps while learning how to better care and show love & gratitude for them, and myself, too.
🌺 Mannywellz’s “Skedaddle”. I think anyone can benefit from a 2-minute Afrobeat dance break. Want it to be longer? Follow-up up with “Peace”. Let me see that knee mobility.
🌺Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery (2022) - I had a great time watching this movie with my sister. It makes me want to watch the original Knives Out, which I haven’t seen. If I happened to drive a mini-van with a little T.V. protruding from the center of it, this movie, Everything Everywhere All At Once, and all the Studio Ghibli films would be the only movies allowed. Glass Onion is awfully entertaining, and I went into it with little information on the plot. If you can, I recommend doing the same thing.
Here is some sweetness:
Inspired by Sally Wen Mao’s Ode to Emptiness
Last week, I attended a “Chair Yoga” class. It focuses on Hatha style yoga while using a chair for support. Beside myself and the instructor, all the people in the session’s class (a full one!) were above 60 years old, if I were to guess. So naturally, I thought of my bà ngoại, grandma, who is living in Vietnam. I later discover that chair yoga is predominately geared for older folks. It’s cute that I didn’t know that.
The class drifted me into intentional presence. I noticed myself wishing for a few things, all with a shared level of importance, as I moved—in a chair—from cat to cow to cat again:
I wish bà ngoại was here with me, that we were doing Chair Yoga together.” I imagine us laughing together as we take turns stumbling and finding balance in our bodies. I imagine listening to her breath as we take moments to do only that— breathing.
I wish I could tell her about these exercises in Vietnamese; I wish I could describe them even, show her over FaceTime. I wonder if she’s familiar or would be even interested in yoga.
I wish I could do these things—full body mindfulness opportunities—among more Asian elders. Of the participants, only myself and a Black woman were non-white. I live far from the cities that have a larger Asian population, but it comforts me to trust that there are efforts to make protected space for Asian elders to engage in more leisure and recreational activities.
Finishing building a Legos flowers bouquet with Tessa! I started the bloom assembly with a fellow Capricorn friend on my bday evening, over blueberry-flavored wine.
Feeling pretty, feeling protected, feeling vulnerable through it all
This combo I made for breakfast: mashed potatoes with butter, diced parsley and cilantro, roasted seaweed, and red onion sautéed in coconut oil. Nothing quite this rich, folks.
Images in the tree bark:
THIS IS MY LATE-NIGHT MOUSE MOMENT: clementine, Japanese-style peanuts, super soft mochi, and dried nino banana… featuring a melatonin + L-Theanine tablet.
Found pink butterfly figurine during a walk, which I am trying to do more of <3
My shoes, for a sizing reference.
In my sleeping bag of a jacket, returning home from an evening of chatting with a friend in D.C.
I hope your day is kind to you and you are kind to you.
Warmed,
Isabel