The tree is where you left it. Rejoice!

Seeping pieces of the moon, softly gulping, sticking my tongue out to reflect the taste of a new year

Nice to see you in the new year!

I hope you are receiving what you need right now. Part of the process of receiving is putting the language of your needs together, like a lego set. Now I am imagining what the marketing of this lego product would look like...

"Build a stunning labyrinth of architectural wonder fit for any yearner. Brick by brick: Babel's Tower of your Desire!".

With the mixed emotions and ennui I've been experiencing--if you feel similarly--let me remind both of us that we're enough.

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The time between December to January (especially for Us Capricorns) feels to me like world building. This time to repair anything that’s longing for maintenance-work and delve into what-if’s:

What if I made a menu of things I liked making to eat, to lower the cognitive load of deciding what to create on windy weeks? What if I put my phone’s charger further from my bed? What if a new brand of yogurt? What if I forgave myself?

The project of Beobab.tree is important to me. Like any tree, it can be forgotten in a span of dashing to the bus stop and left to its own tree-devices. An entity in the periphery. Like any tree, it can be rediscovered and cherished again. Grounded by nature. It is a tree whose bark can be transcribed, a document humming to the beholder.

I continue the transcriptions with an added dose of valor towards the ways distraction sometimes gets the best (and worst) of us.

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I am proud of how I wrote Year of the Beo. What was shared still holds true to me after two years of being tossed in or moseying into different situations. I am proud of how I've grown and the mindset I cultivated.

The Waxing/Waning form is analog to the wretched "In's and Out's" lists that storm social media at this time (I am for personal reflection, less so the corporate co-optation of the format to sneak in their business' product, subliminally or overtly). Like with other movements in the past, changing the wordage disguises texts to slip under the radar. Purposeful in not being scooped up by a forced algorithm.

What I like better about borrowing language from the moon is 1. the moon is wise, let us trust it and 2. it captures the slow, methodical process of change. Whereas ins n outs conjures a haste and throwing away, waxing and waning invites phasing. So, yeah, "Waxing & Waning" it is.

With any new or concerted habit, a lot of grace is in the wings.

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Waxing

• Simplifying my digital world

I'll keep this private, though if you know-me-know-me, you know I love to talk about process and (warning, corporate buzzword) personal knowledge management IRL. You'll just have to catch me in-line at the groceries or jogging on a tree-lined street.

I am compartmentalizing how I visit websites and applications, understanding that these are "visits". When the internet is a portal of flux, it means you are coming from somewhere.

For me it, it's important to return to the nondigital, physical playground--the place I get to prepare a yummy meal and take myself to the gym, to the local library. To hear an unfiltered laugh of a friend and peck the cheek of my love.

I am outlining what each application's purpose is, how I'd like to act within its sheets of code.

• Discernment: doing things with feeling and/or without feeling

Some might tag this as "resolve". Over autumn, I kept running up to the realization: I don't NEED to feel a certain way to get something done, to take the next step ahead.

I seem to harbor the hustle for the right things at the wrong time. While I've explored the lit on working according to your circadian profile, the demands of my school/work schedule laughs at it.

I've busied myself or opted to "bed rot" to coax the feeling of motivation and spirit of discipline. Nothing replaces honest hard work or focus. Sometimes I hyper-plan my days, to the hour, as an attempt to have control. What follows is Change and Something Unexpected, so the day's skeleton never holds up to its flesh.

Over-planning becomes weak defense and coping mechanism. The flow-state comes from not forcing anything, and it does require moving. There is still discernment to be honed because it is necessary to do things with intention, with feeling. Aligning your actions with choices that sit right based on your values remains a virtue.

“Just do it.”

Short list: paying in cash (to encourage good-budgeting habits), attending instrumental music performances (living in a college town, I want to cherish the ephemera of its soundscape), asking both:

"What do I feel like doing" and,

"Could ______ physically get done despite feeling how I do right now? If so, let’s do it. If not, how will I know the feeling has changed for me to engage well?"

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Waning

• Multi-tasking

I’d like to phase out holding so many fruits in my arms that the few fall and get bruised. I understand the practicality of attending to various elements. Though, I have felt one side of the pole (hyper-multitasking to the point of distraction), and I want to recalibrate my sense of priority so that things get done and are done well.

One of my strengths is adaptability. When abused, I lose purpose, then focus.

Creating opportunity for clarity and protecting it through spoken boundaries are the ways I stay rooted. Whether that is time to rest, develop my skills, reflect, or ideate, the present deserves full attention.

• What is owned

I am slated to move this summer, which means having to reckon with what is mine to bring with or repurpose. A change as immense has moving cities is exhausting as I come into contact with a flurry choices I've made as I accrued things. Yes, I got that because it was on sale. Ah! That's where it's been. Oh, I made the right choice here--it still sparks delight.

Because I am human and have the memory of pain from moving before, I figured I start in January with locating what can be kept, given, sold, eaten, destroyed, looped into a craft. That way, the month It Happens can be focused on spending time with people I can't take with.

How to endeavor this? I've completed 80% of the Mins Game a year ago, and it kinda worked! I'll bring it into a new context over the next few months. While I was on a beach last week, I itemized the furniture under my name to figure them new homes, in friends, the community, and FB marketplace. Let's hope moving is not so laborious come July-ish.

Short list: blind boxes, my old agenda/task list system, keeping wish-lists on a cloud-based server, Notion, doing anything for a trend

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My birthday is just up ahead, so we got the chocolate mousse cake, with its three pirouetting chocolate pieces laid equal-distant across cursive hearts.

Because I am leaving home shortly after the occasion, I am slivering a bit to enjoy each morning leading up to the interception of a 26th year. It’s nice.

Next Wednesday, a Leaflet will float into your inbox (or however you read these things).

Thanks for being here with me, after all this time.

~Isabel